Assalamualaikum,
It's 31 May 2011, Tuesday, today. This post is written at 10:38PM, I probably just made it the third post for May, one short for my "one post per week" goal. Too bad. I've been busy, as usual. It's the norm to be 'busy' nowadays. Perhaps part of society, to be 'busy'. I finished my prelim papers last Tuesday, so it has been exactly one week since I ended my exams. This week is technically a holiday, but I have school for the entire week; as per normal. Well, these are just some simple sacrifices need to be made.
Important things. I received my papers today! But it's all unstable and subject to change and complex calculations, so I will not dwell too much on that and just wait for the final reports. With the marks and all. Didn't do too shabby for a Prelim paper, in Victoria School, the school with super high expectations and standards. Not to pick on it but I don't think this amount of stress on a student is humane. I pretty much burnt out in the middle of the third week of my exams. I tried my best to study and revise, but the drive just wasn't there. Everything went against my plans during the first two weeks of exams. Renovations and stuff just bothering me. You might accuse me of being too sensitive, well it's true, I'm too sensitive. I'm sensitive to dust, noise and change. Change is needed in life, and I have reactions to it. Well, my point is that I don't mind doing such tough papers from VS, I mean, I asked for it. I really want to do well for my O levels.
I recently read that expressing your life goals to others will make you LESS likely to achieve it. Based on the evidence brought forward, I'm partially bought. Well, in case you haven't realised, I never really blogged about my real goals in life. Nor have I told anyone, except Abdullah, even then, he doesn't know it's my goals, (I think). I only give subtle clues to what I want to do in life. From this post, you know that my goals require good O levels. You can also tell from my concerns that I've expressed in the past about societal, political and educational issues. Alone I may not combat these problems, but I do hope to achieve something in my life. Enough said.
Back to reality, I guess my holidays are gone. The next three weeks will mostly be dedicated to completing my Art Coursework. Not everyday of course, whenever I deem fit I guess. Art is all about the mood. You cannot force someone to sit in a room and make 'art'. Maybe one day it's possible. Abdullah has agreed to act for my video. But I promised myself that I will dedicate MORE time for my revisions. Perhaps do some of the past year prelim papers that I neglected to do. I always assumed doing O levels papers were enough. Well, O level papers are enough for O levels, not for the extremely difficult prelims.
The constantly changing subjects in this post mirrors my state of mind. I type, where my mind wanders. Now, I'm going everywhere. I'm thinking about everything. The day I stop thinking, is the day I die, as a person, a human.
Some rough information about my prelim papers: I did 'above average' for English. You do not want to know what the average is. I was short of one mark for most of my paper to achieve a higher grade, meaning they were all 'high B4s, B3s, A2s' etc. I don't know if you understand. That is all I guess.
Salam...Peace!
A sidenote:
Who is this 'you' I'm speaking to?
I've always imagined 'you' to be the future generation. I do not intend people to read this now. If you do then, fine. It's great. My treasures, adventures and misadventures.I wish to leave some form of knowledge, life lesson for those in the future. It may not be relevant to your time (seeing as times change quickly nowadays), but it may provide insight into the mind and life of a person from the beginning of the 21st century. A brief documentation of my life, in text. (There used to be pictures, but I don't upload those anymore.)
I've been getting ideas about maybe publishing my blog in a book? Hmm? Whadya think of that?
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Singular Matrix
How was I supposed to know what a singular matrix is? Sigh, 4 marks down the drain all because of an obscure sentence on line 7 in page 5 of my textbook that escaped me.
'If |M| = 0, we say that M is singular'
Otherwise, the only thing that could bring me down is my carelessness. Tomorrow is A Maths Paper 2. Been doing Prelim compilations since noon. That's a measly 2 hours and 40 minutes spent.
On a side note, I hope the renovations, drilling, painting destroying will be done soon. It has been extremely distracting since it started two weeks before my exams. In fact, studying in the PUBLIC LIBRARY, that's right the one filled with noisy neighborhood school students, was more productive.
'If |M| = 0, we say that M is singular'
Otherwise, the only thing that could bring me down is my carelessness. Tomorrow is A Maths Paper 2. Been doing Prelim compilations since noon. That's a measly 2 hours and 40 minutes spent.
On a side note, I hope the renovations, drilling, painting destroying will be done soon. It has been extremely distracting since it started two weeks before my exams. In fact, studying in the PUBLIC LIBRARY, that's right the one filled with noisy neighborhood school students, was more productive.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
A quick one (GE2011)
Assalamualaikum,
It's morning right now. I'm in the bus interchange and I realised that I lacked 2 blog posts for this month. I guess I'll start with the General Elections 2011. Well, as usual PAP won a vast majority of the seats, but just barely. They got their so-called mandate by winning about 60% of the votes. However, this elections was a reason to rejoice because one opposition party managed to win a GRC. Clearly, right now I'm pro-opposition, Workers' Party in particular. But this is not completely uncalled for.
Many of my politically apathetic teenage peers have asked me,"If its not broken, why change it? Just vote for the PAP." The problem is, it is broken. The PAP has been increasingly arrogant and do not really put the needs of Singaporeans as a priority. The have Singapore's best interest. Unfortunately, in this modern day and age, Singapore and Singaporeans have slowly grown to be two separate entities. The government has been made to be completely dependent on the PAP, by the PAP. All they care about is increasing our GDP and economy. Well, GDP doesn't necessarily mean local-produced/earned revenue. They've been hiring LOADS of foreigners to take Singaporean jobs. Nobody seems to care about extremely high HDB prices or the fact that ministers earn in 2 hours what normal people earn in a month. Actually, we do. The 40%, whom I greatly respect because of their courageous attitude for standing against an oppressing government, cares about Singaporeans. Unfortunately, because of the remaining 60%, 100% of Singaporeans (I mean 51% of Singaporeans (locals)) have to suffer with you.
All in all, I believe that uninterrupted rule and control, corrupts. As the old adage goes:"Power corrupts, absolute power, corrupts absolutely." More opposition needs to be in parliament and allow for healthy debate of policies and bills; to ensure Singaporeans' needs are placed first.
Thank you.
Salam..peace!
P.s. I have A Maths exams today! Extremely nervous!
It's morning right now. I'm in the bus interchange and I realised that I lacked 2 blog posts for this month. I guess I'll start with the General Elections 2011. Well, as usual PAP won a vast majority of the seats, but just barely. They got their so-called mandate by winning about 60% of the votes. However, this elections was a reason to rejoice because one opposition party managed to win a GRC. Clearly, right now I'm pro-opposition, Workers' Party in particular. But this is not completely uncalled for.
Many of my politically apathetic teenage peers have asked me,"If its not broken, why change it? Just vote for the PAP." The problem is, it is broken. The PAP has been increasingly arrogant and do not really put the needs of Singaporeans as a priority. The have Singapore's best interest. Unfortunately, in this modern day and age, Singapore and Singaporeans have slowly grown to be two separate entities. The government has been made to be completely dependent on the PAP, by the PAP. All they care about is increasing our GDP and economy. Well, GDP doesn't necessarily mean local-produced/earned revenue. They've been hiring LOADS of foreigners to take Singaporean jobs. Nobody seems to care about extremely high HDB prices or the fact that ministers earn in 2 hours what normal people earn in a month. Actually, we do. The 40%, whom I greatly respect because of their courageous attitude for standing against an oppressing government, cares about Singaporeans. Unfortunately, because of the remaining 60%, 100% of Singaporeans (I mean 51% of Singaporeans (locals)) have to suffer with you.
All in all, I believe that uninterrupted rule and control, corrupts. As the old adage goes:"Power corrupts, absolute power, corrupts absolutely." More opposition needs to be in parliament and allow for healthy debate of policies and bills; to ensure Singaporeans' needs are placed first.
Thank you.
Salam..peace!
P.s. I have A Maths exams today! Extremely nervous!
Friday, April 29, 2011
General Elections, Olevels Preliminary One and less important things
Assalamualaikum.
Truly, the hype and excitement of this year's General Election has gotten to me. I have been trying to keep track of the different parties who are competing for the various constituency. This year is the year with the greatest number of opposing parties since the independence of Singapore. All constituencies are challenged except Tanjong Pagar. A particular party has been doing quite well in their rallies. The Workers Party. Fresh faces to change the political landscape of Singapore? Could this be the year PAP finally steps down? I don't know, and in my humble opinion, I don't think so. Maybe the opposition can win about a quarter or a third? I mean all my life in Singapore, PAP has been the one controlling my home. It's been going fine, and perhaps many people feel that way, they don't want things to change? Perhaps they do not see what mistakes the current government has done. Maybe there aren't any, if you hide them well.
So I heard the Workers' Party had a great turnout on their rally, about 3000 people, or more? The digits escape me. I would love to see a new government with equal opposition on both sides? This would make the news pretty interesting I must say. However, the people do not want their peace to be interupted either, it's a tough balance between...ermm, fun and peace? I notice I've been writing plenty of question marks. Perhaps my current lackadaisical attitude is making me lazy to think? There it goes again, another question mark. Let's move to a more serious thing. My prelims.
It is bugging me quite abit, hence the lateness of this entry. I can safely say that I have revised my Maths and Sciences about 90%. I'm left with Geography and PAP's propaganda of a subject, Social Studies. I haven't really went into "overdrive", nor have I been slacking. I did plenty of ten year series and compilations. I've made notes. I hope I am prepared. I mean, I'm almost, ALMOST, at my limit. I'm, as usual, blogging in extra, as they say, "Chim", English to practice for my English Compositions and Social Studies essays as well as my Study Of Visual Art paper. That's a lot actually now that I look again. Have I bitten off more than I can swallow. Hopefully not. I can do this, InsyaAllah.
Salam, Peace. For you my dear reader.
Truly, the hype and excitement of this year's General Election has gotten to me. I have been trying to keep track of the different parties who are competing for the various constituency. This year is the year with the greatest number of opposing parties since the independence of Singapore. All constituencies are challenged except Tanjong Pagar. A particular party has been doing quite well in their rallies. The Workers Party. Fresh faces to change the political landscape of Singapore? Could this be the year PAP finally steps down? I don't know, and in my humble opinion, I don't think so. Maybe the opposition can win about a quarter or a third? I mean all my life in Singapore, PAP has been the one controlling my home. It's been going fine, and perhaps many people feel that way, they don't want things to change? Perhaps they do not see what mistakes the current government has done. Maybe there aren't any, if you hide them well.
So I heard the Workers' Party had a great turnout on their rally, about 3000 people, or more? The digits escape me. I would love to see a new government with equal opposition on both sides? This would make the news pretty interesting I must say. However, the people do not want their peace to be interupted either, it's a tough balance between...ermm, fun and peace? I notice I've been writing plenty of question marks. Perhaps my current lackadaisical attitude is making me lazy to think? There it goes again, another question mark. Let's move to a more serious thing. My prelims.
It is bugging me quite abit, hence the lateness of this entry. I can safely say that I have revised my Maths and Sciences about 90%. I'm left with Geography and PAP's propaganda of a subject, Social Studies. I haven't really went into "overdrive", nor have I been slacking. I did plenty of ten year series and compilations. I've made notes. I hope I am prepared. I mean, I'm almost, ALMOST, at my limit. I'm, as usual, blogging in extra, as they say, "Chim", English to practice for my English Compositions and Social Studies essays as well as my Study Of Visual Art paper. That's a lot actually now that I look again. Have I bitten off more than I can swallow. Hopefully not. I can do this, InsyaAllah.
"But there's no sense crying over every mistake."That song is nice. Somewhat nostalgic in an odd way. Oh yes, the less important thing. Today 29 April 2011, there's a Royal Wedding between Prince William and Catherine Middleton in the UK, one of the few places on Earth with a monarchy. Politics. I don't really like the word, and I regret delving into that theme here, but it must be done I guess. I'll end it off right here. Expect more soon, since I need to practice.
-Portal, Still Alive
Salam, Peace. For you my dear reader.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Practice Makes Perfect
"I srsly cnt mk it lurhh.. Lifezxc is Sooo lamezz... Cnt b bthrd t do anthng bt it. Y eu do this 2 mee?!?!?:
0_o~ eu no ntq bt lve so dun say anyhow like u hd years of xprienceXczbdg.."
Remember when people used to write like that online and in SMSes? Well they still do despite the advent of modern communication technology being literally a decade ago.
Salam.
0_o~ eu no ntq bt lve so dun say anyhow like u hd years of xprienceXczbdg.."
Remember when people used to write like that online and in SMSes? Well they still do despite the advent of modern communication technology being literally a decade ago.
Salam.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Reflections-6 Months left
Assalamualaikum,
Truly I am not in my best mental state. When I say assalamualaikum, i mean it, because peace is very valuable to me. By peace, I do not only mean physically, where you're alone and undisturbed. I mean peace where you have full control of your mind, body and soul. School has been very demanding, Sec 4 life is alot harder and stressful than it legally should be. I try my best to do things for myself. I keep telling myself that I should work hard for may sake. But time and time again I see myself trying to please those around me. And time and time again, i tell myself that it is a lost cause. These people will never be satisfied, will they? The greater cause still prevails and motivates me daily, when everyone just don't seem to care anymore. I see it as clear as day, why I am doing this. Why I am putting so much effort, why I am sacrifising so much. My family, friends and everything important.
I no longer care if people don't look at me as a good person for they do not know me. I know for a fact that my intentions are honest and noble. If you keep telling me that I am not doing the right thing, I won't listen, it's the little sane part of me left that determines what's real and what's merely smoke and mirrors.
Yup, I'm truly confident that everyone will benefit from this cause, except maybe not me, but I don't care. The world deserves this.
Salam.
Truly I am not in my best mental state. When I say assalamualaikum, i mean it, because peace is very valuable to me. By peace, I do not only mean physically, where you're alone and undisturbed. I mean peace where you have full control of your mind, body and soul. School has been very demanding, Sec 4 life is alot harder and stressful than it legally should be. I try my best to do things for myself. I keep telling myself that I should work hard for may sake. But time and time again I see myself trying to please those around me. And time and time again, i tell myself that it is a lost cause. These people will never be satisfied, will they? The greater cause still prevails and motivates me daily, when everyone just don't seem to care anymore. I see it as clear as day, why I am doing this. Why I am putting so much effort, why I am sacrifising so much. My family, friends and everything important.
I no longer care if people don't look at me as a good person for they do not know me. I know for a fact that my intentions are honest and noble. If you keep telling me that I am not doing the right thing, I won't listen, it's the little sane part of me left that determines what's real and what's merely smoke and mirrors.
Yup, I'm truly confident that everyone will benefit from this cause, except maybe not me, but I don't care. The world deserves this.
Salam.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Rain/Election Fever
Assalamualaikum,
It's been a long week. This is my first post for April. Yesterday, I went for a flag day. It was organized by KDF and all the sec 4s of my school were forced to go. It wasn't that bad. Except for the 4 hours of standing. I learnt that it was a pain to collect donations. This is not my first time doing flag day, maybe the third. As you can see from my title, it's raining. It has been raining extremely heavily, with lightning and thunder in the afternoon since Friday. Pretty scary to be out in the open in this kind of weather.
If you were to enter my house, you'll notice something. No furniture! Just a carpet and a 46 inch Samasung LED tv. Some major renovation is about to happen some time soon. I dunno. My mom wants to make some sort of 'alcove' what ever that is, but it sounds cozy. I don't mind the change. Also my room has considerably much more space after we removed a shelf and rearranged my bed and wardrobe. It's neat.
Also, if you've been under a rock, like me, Singapore is having another General Election in May, where people can vote for new leaders in their Group Representation Constituencies (GRCs) if the opposition (I.e. Workers' Party) wants to..erm..'challenge' for that GRC? I'm not into politics, nor am I able to vote because I'm not 21, yet. But if I were to vote for someone, it would be the party that promises to remove foreigners and place stricter policies for immigrants to get citizenship. I mean 5 million Singaporeans, with 2.1 million foreigners (40%), are literally taking up so much space. We have a population density of about 7000 people per square kilometre. Madness, especially in such a country with land constraints, PAP better do something, because I hear some other parties have some good things to say about this issue. What do I know, who am I to say such things? Just disregard me.
Goodbye.
It's been a long week. This is my first post for April. Yesterday, I went for a flag day. It was organized by KDF and all the sec 4s of my school were forced to go. It wasn't that bad. Except for the 4 hours of standing. I learnt that it was a pain to collect donations. This is not my first time doing flag day, maybe the third. As you can see from my title, it's raining. It has been raining extremely heavily, with lightning and thunder in the afternoon since Friday. Pretty scary to be out in the open in this kind of weather.
If you were to enter my house, you'll notice something. No furniture! Just a carpet and a 46 inch Samasung LED tv. Some major renovation is about to happen some time soon. I dunno. My mom wants to make some sort of 'alcove' what ever that is, but it sounds cozy. I don't mind the change. Also my room has considerably much more space after we removed a shelf and rearranged my bed and wardrobe. It's neat.
Also, if you've been under a rock, like me, Singapore is having another General Election in May, where people can vote for new leaders in their Group Representation Constituencies (GRCs) if the opposition (I.e. Workers' Party) wants to..erm..'challenge' for that GRC? I'm not into politics, nor am I able to vote because I'm not 21, yet. But if I were to vote for someone, it would be the party that promises to remove foreigners and place stricter policies for immigrants to get citizenship. I mean 5 million Singaporeans, with 2.1 million foreigners (40%), are literally taking up so much space. We have a population density of about 7000 people per square kilometre. Madness, especially in such a country with land constraints, PAP better do something, because I hear some other parties have some good things to say about this issue. What do I know, who am I to say such things? Just disregard me.
Goodbye.
